November 3, 2014

Olivia

Meet Robby's boss Olivia. She supports her employees' D.C. sports fanaticism by sponsoring things like "jersey day" in the office. This is her way of showing that she's hip enough to know who Peter Bondra is, but more importantly, it gives her a way to monitor office loyalties. She once fired someone for posing as a Flyers fan on Japers' Rink just to "stir things up" in the midst of the lockout. When interviewing people to fill the position, she asked each candidate to provide a writing sample on the topic "What would Ovechkin do?" during various scenarios like: Elijah from accounting is searching for specific tax information from last year and comes to you for advice. The person she hired wrote the same answer for every scenario, "Go to the Ovi spot and fire away". She has little patience for wasting time at the office but does allow people to read and comment on articles at Japers' Rink over their lunch break - she goes by the handle "TooHotToTrotz", which is also tattooed on her shoulder. She is happily single and lost interest in dating ever since Sean Avery asked her out on Twitter.